how to fight

Sun Tzu said in "The Art of War":

"Warfare is the Way of deception. Thus although you are capable, display incapability to them. When committed to employing your forces, feign inactivity. When your objective is near, make it appear as if distant; when far away, create the illusion of being nearby."

If you have lots of money, display being broke. I am doing not too bad, yet my ex believes that I am broke. I drive a beat up car, wear Wal Mart Clothes, and have made her believe I'm a barely employed, complete loser with no goals, ambition, money, nor future.

I have lied to her, saying I am on Section 8, scamming them into believing that my mother, ex-girlfriend, her two kids, are all still living with me, and that if I wasn't perpetuating this lie, I would be in the street. I told her my employment is spotty, and that I exploit the lack of employment. I told her I am driving without car insurance because I can't afford it. I told her I have no access to health insurance. I told her I haven't been looking at family law and that I don't have money for a lawyer. Today, I told her my bank account is overdrawn and next week, she will hear I have been demoted at work. Right now, she views me as an underemployed loser with no goals. Nothing could be farther from the truth.

All these are lies. I am ready to POUNCE! I have everything in place, ready to go, waiting to save up another $2000 to pay the retainer. I will be sitting for the exam to get my license as a land surveyor hopefully this Fall, if not, next Spring. My income is high, and will get higher. My employer is very happy with me. My goal is to get my license and either buy the company I work for now or strike out on my own. Either way, my income will increase by 5 times. In addition, I will be buying rental properties. I can throw money at lawyers forever.

She has the complete wrong idea about me. Why is this an advantage? When I file a motion to change custody due to my son missing 8 days of school this year, 9 days last year, 15 days the year before, and 35 days in Kindergarten (her lawyer stipulated to a change in custody if excessive absences became an issue again), she will respond with bat shit crazy allegations of fraud, perhaps even contacting those departments and filing complaints.

I will be able to easily prove her allegations are false, and since she has a history of false allegations, this will reinforce that's she's completely nuts. When asked why she would make such allegations, the answer will be "I have no idea. I'm not a psychologist." Since none of this deception is in writing, she cannot prove in court she was lied to. As the stress of being unable to prove what she believes to true continues, she will begin to act more and more nuts, giving the judge quite a show.

This will be a complete shock and surprise to her. She will be caught off guard, and most importantly, unrecoverable. Once the attack is made on "Fatal Terrain" (a situation where your opponent is a sitting duck, at a complete disadvantage to you), victory is inevitable.

If you're broke, and can't get it together, take actions that make your ex think you have a secret stash of money at a bank somewhere, which you made selling drugs, being a prostitute, or by some other easily disprovable means. Tell them the reason you're not working is because you have money in the bank, Anything that gets them to make outlandish accusations against you and end up looking crazy is what you're after.

Is it dirty? Yep. Is it unfair? Oh yeah. Is it mean? Certainly. Is it what the other party deserves? Of course. They would do no less with this knowledge. Probably worse. Do you want to win? If so, fight dirty.